The Sauced Chef

Fat Head’s South Side Saloon, Pittsburgh, PA

Pittsburgh, PA

www.fatheads.com

The legendary Fatheads is located on Pittsburgh’s vibrant south side, in the midst of many cool places to get your sauce on.  Conveniently, there is paid parking across the street.  Recognize this place by the big bloated mustached head with sunglasses

 Get Sauced: 4 out of 4

One needs to go no farther than here to go on a bender.  They have everything a booze lover could dream of.  It was like Fathead Wonka just opened up a oak barrelled door to his fantasy factory and blinded me with the IPA, Beligian Dubbel, Bock, Maibock, Pilsner and Wheat beer waterfalls, the whiskey rain, the scotch pond and the floofy area known as the wine flower garden.  Hopefully this dream world has a bathroom.  Seriously, one of the most impressive beer lists I’ve ever seen. Rogue actually brews an exclusive brand for Fathead only.  I guzzled the house-brewed Hunter’s Head IPA, which was hoppy with a good malt backbone and a diversity of flavor notes. I downed the house-brewed Heller Bock and immediately ordered a second.  This was my favorite. The Heller Bock tasted very similar to a dark wheat beer, but it had a lighter bread taste and a higher hop top note.  Utterly delicious.  I also tried their hand-pulled tap which was Bear Republic Red Rocket Ale from Cali, which I’ve had before, fantastic! Fatheads has a diversity of whiskeys and scotches and offers whiskey flights.  The wine list is as expected for a brewery.  If you go to Fatheads for the first time and order wine, I will personally come to your house and hide some stinky cheese under your pillow!

The Sauce: 4 out of 4

The menu is MASSIVE.  Normally, I would be turned off by such a large beast.  But, much like reading an exciting, adrenaline-pumping novel, I couldn’t put this bastard down (speaking of bastards, they actually have Arrogant Bastard battered onion rings!).  Take as much time as you need to figure out what you want.  The servers understand this, don’t worry. We started with the wings.  Fatheads offers 14 different wing variations from traditional favorites like honey-bbq and mild buffalo to creative new flavors like salt-n-vinegar and spicy parmesan.  My favorite was the spicy parmesan, a nutty and sweet topnote with a real tomatoey kick to finish it off.  My least favorite was the salt-n-vinegar, creative but tastes just like one would expect.  Now to the main course, the Headwiches! A Headwich is a gigantor sandwich inspired by a moment of genius of some member of the Fathead staff.  18 of these mouth-watering bad boys stared at me and it was damn hard to make a decision.  I pondered the Maxim award winning South Slope Headwich , made with pierogies, kielbasa and grilled onions.  I contemplated the Beer Camp Headwich, packed full of bacon, bbq sauce, sharp cheddar and house-made 1000 island dressing.  I salivated over the Artery Clogger Headwich, full of greasy goodness (bacon, fried eggs, mayo).  I ended up choosing the PCI Headwich, an italian style club with ham, salami, capicola, banana peppers and rosemary mayo.  This thing was spot on! The amounts of meat to veg ratio was perfect and the rosemary mayo provided a unique floral aftertaste.  I tried like mad to finish this tough puppy but (much to my chagrin) needed a woof-woof bag. I also sampled their cherry-pepper mayo and enjoyed the deep astringency of it with their crispy fries.

The Reduction: + 1  Ambiance  for  9  out of 10

Customer service was as expected.  The waitress knew the menu and did a great job giving me recommendations.  She was a bit slow on the beer refill take though, not penalty slow, just a tad bit molassely. The ambiance is unique in its simplicity, having a sports bar type feel inside a simple brick building.  I love all the hand-painted craft beer logos, word on the street says that the brewer himself does all of them.  There also is a aura of fun and awe (of what we are collectively experiencing)  by the customers, we immediately struck up a conversation with some British businessmen sitting next to us, just over the beer list.  The Sauced Chef will not rest until he’s tried every single headwich and makes it to the Fathead Elite.  You have to experience this place at least once in your life!

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The Detroit Beer Company

Detroit, MI

www.detroitbeerco.com

Whether having some grub before watching the Lions lose or guzzling down a beer before a ballet, the DBC is the perfect place to start your Detroit adventure. The DBC has a great location with ample (and relatively cheap) parking less than one block away. 

 Get Sauced: 4 out of 4

The DBC offers a wide variety of creative, tasty and uniquely different taps brewed in house.  They boast 3 beers that have won awards at the Great American Beer Festival.  Their brewer (Kevin Rodger) also experiments with “seasonal taps” ensuring frequent guests or “mug clubbers” will have a beer variety every time they walk-in (even Norm would be proud!). They have an impressive wine list for those weirdos who would go to a brewery and actually order wine, alongside a creative martini list boasting top shelf products. My favorite beer is also their most decorated beer, The Detroit Dwarf.  Getting its name from a spooky Detroit legend, the Dwarf offers a distinct balance between hops and malt, with a rich texture and earthy aftertaste. 

The Sauce: 2 out of 4

In the spirit of the great American spaghetti Western, this portion of the review is a case of the good, the bad and THE UGLY!

The Good; the BBQ sauce! More tang than sweet, with a great vinegar bite and a peppery, spicy finish.  I could drink a bucket of this stuff.

The Bad; not enough BBQ sauce! I sampled two dishes, one of them was the meatloaf sandwich with the amazing sauce.  The problem was that I would have never found out how good the sauce was if I hadn’t specifically ordered a side of it.  The sauce was so engulfed by the onions, meat and bread, it barely contributed to the flavor of the sandwich   I’m not sure if this is a case of the chef trying to save $$$ or just a poorly portioned plate, but the sauce was almost non-existent.  If it were me serving this dish, I would include a side of BBQ sauce as standard on the plate. It’s SO GOOD!

The UGLY; the Farfalle Caprese! Do not order this dish!I was expecting a hot take on one of my favorite cold summertime snacks, the Caprese salad. Instead, I received warm pasta soup with mushy tomatoes and random half-melted parmesan blobs! A cold Caprese salad consists of fresh basil, crisp tomatoes, fresh mozzarella, balsamic vinaigrette, olive oil, salt and pepper.  This warm pasta version didn’t come anywhere close to the mark.  This dish was wrong on so many levels! Firstly, why put parmesan cheese in this? It vastly overpowered the wee bit of basil in the dish and eliminated any flavor subtlety. Secondly, why not dice the tomatoes to hide their mushiness? The cherry tomatoes were just cut in half.  Warm and mushy tomatoes cut in half don’t offer flavor to the sauce and provide an unappetizing mouthfeel. Finally, the SAUCE! It literally looked liked some weird version of chicken noodle soup! It was that watery! Why not blend in some light cream with the mozzarella and thicken it? If it was high noon, I’d shoot this pasta right in its mushy balls!

The Reduction: +/- Customer Service and + 1/2 Ambiance  for  6 1/2 out of 10

The customer service was not great but it wasn’t terrible either.  I asked the server if the pasta was normally this watery (in a nice way, of course!) and she adamantly told me “yes”. I wondered if she would get the hint from my couched inference.  She didn’t.

The ambiance is aesthetically cool! Two stories with a decent view of downtown Detroit.  The really annoying thing that I couldn’t get over is that one of the seemingly new flat-screen TV’s (there are many, btw) was broken.  The feed for the football game keep on choppily jumping around, along with the sound.  This TV just so happened to be right smack-dab in my line of vision.  It was like a train-wreck, I couldn’t look away.

Overall, I think it was a case of bad luck.  Watching the other dishes come out, they looked much better than the pasta dish.  I think I may have ordered the worst thing on the menu.  The TV thing was annoying, but I’m sure that will be fixed or is already fixed.  I’d go there again just for the wonderful beer!

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Go to any established “gourmet’ restaurant and they have their waitstaff trained to suggest wine with dishes.  They are quick to talk about tannins, terrior, body and aroma and how these things paired with (insert dish here) will double the enjoyment of your dining experience. However, ask that same server about beer pairing and watch the confusion, the indecision and in some cases the immediate scoffing at the suggestion. Why isn’t beer gourmet?

Well, I think beer IS gourmet and want to address the three most common myths that surround beer.

Myth # 1: Beer is easier to make than wine

This is flat out not true.  I am not here to start a war between vintners and brewers, because I love beer and wine equally, but beer brewing is definitely as complex as wine making.  Many of the brewers I talk shop with also have chemistry degrees! Brewing beer is a painstaking and rewarding SCIENCE.  Vintners have the earthy artistry of the terrior, which takes on mythical and magical qualities.  Brewers have the science of sanitation management (imperative) and the artistry of where in the brewing process (if any) to add additional flavorings (raspberry, vanilla, pumpkin, coffee etc).  Any way you slice it, its EQUALLY difficult to make wine or beer.

Myth # 2: Beer is mass produced and low quality

If you haven’t seen the movie Beer Wars, go see it! This film will explain what actually happens in the commercialized brewing world, things get intense and, sadly, a bit shady. Yes, it has been documented that some of the mass produced beer companies sacrifice corn and rice intro their wort (a liquid produced from malt and hot water) instead of higher quality barley mixes.  Does it actually produce a lower quality flavor, many say yes, some say no.  That’s something you will have to judge.  Here’s a tip: TAKE ADVANTAGE OF LOCAL MICROBREWED BEER! Every state in the union has microbreweries that produce hand-crafted, high quality beer.  Craft beer is becoming so popular with Gen X and Y that big beer companies are scrambling to make their own “craft” off-brands. These beers are high quality, vibrant, flavorful and as distinct and different as red to white wine.  The young brewer movement is exciting and constantly changing.  New ideas and flavor profiles (chocolate, vanilla, oak, pepper, squash, jalapeno, caramel) are fluttering around the industry everywhere.  For the patriots out there, the American IPA is becoming the WORLD’S new trendy beer, that’s right folks, created and invented right here in the USA.  Most brewers brew high-quality and local beers.

Myth # 3: Beer does not pair well with gourmet cuisine

Balderdash! Baloney! Pa-Tooey! Ju-Ju Charp! (made that one up) Beer and food pairing is the nouvelle thing in cuisine today. In my opinion, beer pairs as well with food as wine.  The cool thing is that many people don’t know how to pair beer and food because there exists such limited resources.  That is what I am here for, being the Sauced Chef, one can imagine that I have consumed many a beer (not too hard to imagine, is it?)  I’ve also tried many different beers with many food combinations.  Here are some delicious pairings I recommend.

Blonde or Golden Ales or Lightly Hopped Lagers – these work best as thirst quenchers, try them with highly seasoned or “blackened” foods.  The light golden taste can act as a natural enhancer to the seasoning while giving your palette relief. Very nice with pan-seared fish as well.

Amber Ale, Dry Porters – these work really well with steak! A nice dry porter with a filet or ribeye will enhance the savory umami of the beef while adding a subtle finish to the bite.

Bitter Ales, American IPA’s- these are solid gold with anything fried, the intense hop flavor cutting through grease like Bruce Lee.  I love a citrus based American IPA with anything spicy, it enhances and subtracts at the same time, a taste fireworks show on my tongue.

Weissbeer or Dunkelweiss - Pasta! Any pasta that is delicately seasoned these beers will really compliment the flavor.  Try the weiss with chicken and seafood pastas and the dark with sausage and red meat based pastas.

Cream or sweet stouts, imperial stouts - one word: Chocolate! If you have the chance to try a berry based chocolate dessert (i.e. chocolate brulee with raspberry mousse) with a sweet stout, you will be in culinary heaven.  I think sweet stouts pair better with chocolate than many dessert wines.

Beer is gourmet! Realize it, embrace it and try craft beers! Find your local brewers and drink up, go to beer fests and most importantly, order beer at fancy restaurants. The next time a waiter scoffs at your choice of weissbeer with your chicken-basil cream gnocchi, scoff right back at him and enjoy your awesome flavor combination.  You are now part of the movement, my friends.  Get sauced with beer and ignore the sneer!

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